How many times did you feel low? Under confident? And less motivated? How many times did you feel that you are not good enough, or you have self-doubt, how many times did you feel that you can’t do a particular thing, or things and people are changing too fast? How many times did you felt all this and you blamed your emotions on others? Now that is an important question here. As human beings whenever we feel negative we tend to find out reasons behind it and we do not want to take the responsibility for that, we love to console ourselves by being a victim and we love victimizing ourselves. Believe it or not, it happens with all of us. Hence today we are here to help all of them who are feeling this way. We will help them to take responsibility, take a charge of their own emotions.
Let’s begin :
1. Do not set wrong expectations: Many times we set the wrong expectations from our loved ones. It’s not them who are not in our support, it’s us, who expect something wrong. Like Expecting from your newly married friends, to give you the kind of attention, they used to give in your school/college days. We need to understand a fact that they have a new family, new responsibilities now. They have their spouse who will be their first priority no matter what, we need to understand that we can’t expect the same time and effort from them like they used to give before. So here it is not their fault if they can’t be available for the smallest thing that you want, It is us who are expecting something different or wrong. This is just an example. Once you think about what has exactly happened, and why such things happened you will understand ‘when not to expect’. In this way, you will feel better.
2. Give yourself a break: It’s okay if you hate the way things have changed. Remember the last episode from FRIENDS? Joey felt exactly the same way. Where he didn’t want MONDLER to move, he didn’t want Rachel to move to Paris, Phoebe got married, and the 6 of them were not like before. Yet they were together, happy and ready for the future. It is okay to feel that way, but instead of blaming others, we can do one thing, we can just take a small break for ourselves. Think about what is bothering you. Think about what has happened wrong, and how you can make it better. Blaming others will make you more bitter, sorer. Some people grow up and become mature individuals early and some take time, it is completely fine. All we can do is, make ourselves better.
3. Stop the blame games right away: What is more important? Having your relations stronger or blaming others for you are feeling bad? Sometimes you can get hurt and it is completely fine. You will feel angry, hurt, unhappy and that is fine too. But avoiding conversations, not forgiving people when they are genuinely sorry, staying alone and not sharing won’t help either. So take your time to grief, to feel angry but come out of it by stop blaming others for your emotions. If something is bothering, talk it out, if you are angry with someone, hurt by someone tell them what made you feel this way and burn it out and then forget about it, always remember emotions are momentary, relations are permanent.
Sit back, relax and think what is going wrong? If the situations are in your control, take a charge of it and change them, if they aren’t in your control, any way you can’t do anything about it. Feel sad for a while and come out of it for better situations ahead. If you will be stuck at it, keep on thinking about the same things every day it will make you sadder.
These are the ways which will help you take charge of your own emotions. They will help you to grow as a person and become more mature. Remember no situation is permanent unless you want to make it. You are in charge of your happiness. So stay away from negative people and choose Happiness over everything.
All the best,